


Your Charms Are Engraved on My Heart

by Dauhu



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Canon Compliant, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, Its only like 2 sentences of smut but i tagged it to be safe im sorry, Light Angst, M/M, Misunderstandings, Sort of a character study, Soulmate AU, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2020-07-20 08:01:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19988785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dauhu/pseuds/Dauhu
Summary: And they were soulmates, in a universe where your mark is the name of your soulmate, written in your mother's native tongue, and engraved on your chest.Miscommunication is ensured.





	Your Charms Are Engraved on My Heart

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lunarium](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunarium/gifts).



> For Sheith Flower Exchange 2019! Hope you like it! 
> 
> The bouquet is a mix of these flowers: 
> 
> Rose, Deep Pink, Appreciation, Gratitude, ''Thank You for being in my life''  
> Spindle Tree, "Your charms are engraved on my heart"
> 
> Also thank you to 1izardwizard who helped me plan and read through!

  
Keith only learned Japanese until he got to the colors. “Shiro,” or white, was the name of his soulmate. He figured it was Japanese from the shape of the characters, but that was as far as he got. Picking up a new language in exchange for a chance of finding his soulmate, someone who could at least be a good friend, was more than he could ask for in this point of his life. It was an odd name, but he didn’t question it as he traced the kanji again and again on his chest with the hope of finding that person one day. It didn't cross his mind that it could’ve been the Takashi Shirogane of the Galaxy Garrison until he saw him in person.

He intently stared at ‘Shiro’ as he was being introduced to the class, and despite how his heart strings were pulled, he couldn’t help but believe that his instinct was just a fluke. There was no way that a nobody like him could be destined to be with someone like... that. But with Shiro’s invitation to try out the simulator, his instinct wouldn’t let him go that easily. He gracefully maneuvered through the simulation, much to his own satisfaction of being good at something for once, and he couldn’t help but smugly notice the Golden Boy’s impressed expression. With James’ interruption of his streak however, he abruptly crashed, tearing his daydreams down with it. His sudden gravitation and impulses almost landed him in juvie, but of course, Shiro was there to pick him up.

It was almost too good to be true. Maybe things were turning around for Keith -- each free moment of his time at the Garrison was spent with Shiro. They soon fell into a steady rhythm with each other. Keith finally had someone he could depend on, but this was Keith, and he only ever did things without any sense of restraint; he loved Shiro wholeheartedly. Thursday evenings were for the two of them - that is, until he was greeted by someone else at Shiro’s quarters.

“Ah, you must be Keith. Takashi will be out in a bit. I’m Adam, his fiance by the way, if Takashi hasn’t introduced me yet,” he said as he offered his hand and looked kindly down at Keith.

  
No, he hadn’t told Keith, and all he could manage was to weakly grasp Adam’s hand as it was shaken. His mouth dried and he could feel a heat biting at the back of his throat as the realization sunk in. Shiro already had a soulmate, and he was a fool for thinking otherwise. He let his hand limply fall from Adam’s grasp and stared at the floor. Adam gave him an odd look, but Shiro came in a few moments later, rushing to Keith’s side in concern as he noticed his dejection.

  
“Hey, Keith! Sorry about tha- are you okay?” Shiro gently placed his hand on Keith’s shoulder and almost flinched when he could feel the slight tremors running through his small frame. Shiro had never seen him so vulnerable, with those large eyes almost watering and a deep flush running across the bridge of his nose.  
Keith refused to look at him and hesitantly shrugged Shiro’s hand off of his shoulder.

  
“Yeah. I … I just wanted to tell you that I’m not feeling well. Let’s fly another day.” And with that he was running down the corridor, before Shiro could catch him and his onslaught of tears. 

* * *

The next few Thursday nights Keith didn’t show up. Shiro was worried, since it didn’t seem like Keith was physically sick with a cough or cold -- he was definitely a bit sleep deprived from the brief glances he caught in between classes. On yet another Thursday night he sat brooding at his desk; he didn’t want to lose the two closest people two him. He was already having some troubles with Adam, since their priorities had always been contradicting. Shiro accepted those differences, but the thought of losing Keith was different somehow. Granted, perhaps this is what he got for having undecipherable soulmate marks, which always left him with an inexplicable longing, but Adam and Keith were the closest he has experienced such deep ties too.

Shiro sighed in frustration, brushing his fingers through his hair and leaving his palms over his eyes. He escaped to the sudden darkness and remembered his adolescence of tracing his soulmate’s “name” on his chest. There was no known language like it, and after years of researching soulmate marks, or birthmarks over your chest based on the name your mother fatefully bestows onto you. After years, Shiro has given up on the idea that soulmates were his destiny, he hated that the illegible marks resigned him to this fate no matter what; just like a lot of other variables in his life. But a soft rap on his door pulled him back into the soft glow of his desk light. Shiro gasped in realization and ran to the door in anticipation, knowing just who he wanted to see-

“Adam…”

“Hey, Takashi, sorry I’m home so late. The TA meeting really dragged on with exams coming up soon.”

“It’s fine, welcome back.” They shared an absent-minded kiss, routine without any of the affection that Shiro remembered in years past.

“No Keith again? What happened to your Thursday nights?”

“I’m not sure. I’m getting pretty worried, to be honest with you”

“Check up on him? I know how much he means to you,” Adam said from the other room as he left to prepare a late dinner. Shiro was about to follow him, but he did give it a thought.

  
“You’re right-- you don’t mind, Adam?”

“No...it seems like you’ve been down. It’s okay, Takashi,” Adam admitted with hesitant reluctance. He busied himself, continuing to browse the clearly empty refrigerator. Their relationship had been thinner than he’d like, and he wasn’t sure if Keith’s sudden disappearance had been a catalyst to Shiro’s worsening tension. He’d be willing to let it go if that made Takashi more content. He knew, in the least, that he himself wasn’t helping.

Shiro didn’t pick up on the hesitance though, and quickly thanked Adam as he rushed out the door with his leather jacket in hand.

He ran into Keith in the hallway, nearly colliding into each other.

“Keith!”  
  
“S-Shiro, what are you--” Keith started, but recognized the leather jacket. Shiro chuckled, admitting that they probably had the same idea.They both turned towards the direction of the hangar together and fell into an even step, following their familiar routine to fly out into the desert.

They didn’t say anything as they glided through the moonlit desert, the path ingrained in their memories. Keith flew behind Shiro, running through all the conclusions he’d made in the past weeks: Shiro has a soulmate, Shiro’s not his soulmate, But Shiro was still everything, and he still wanted to be in Shiro’s orbit. The slight chance that Adam wasn’t truly Shiro’s soulmate was buried deep within his conscious -- he labeled it as envy, to make things simpler for him though. In the end, soulmates or not, he knew that he was tethered for life. His thoughts slowed as they stop in their usual spot, an outlook to the basin below.

“How have you been, Keith?”

“Fine...just fine,” he admitted, wistfully looking out and wishing that the tension between them would go away. Despite his sudden lapse in their routine, Keith just wanted things to go back to normal. He wanted to move on, but as he looked over to see Shiro’s earnest, patient look, he knew better that this wouldn’t end until he acknowledged it. Keith was honest to a fault, blunt and unfiltered, especially when it came to Shiro.

“It’s just, you know that stupid soulmate stuff. I know. Unexpected for someone like me to care. I just - It was a lot,” he was stuttering now. He didn’t know how to talk about this, his hurt, especially to the person inflicting it on him. It was ironic, and Keith started chuckling.

It was the last thing Shiro expected. Bullying, delinquency, bad grades, even memories of his past foster care… but soulmate problems? It certainly had never crossed Shiro’s mind, and he was suddenly reminded of his own issues. But that wasn’t why he was there, he reminded himself.

“I’m sorry, Keith. You don’t have to tell me more if you don’t want too, but trust me, I’m having my fair share of trouble with this too,” Keith’s eyes widen as he hears this. The envy and confusion in his heart festered. How could anyone give Shiro trouble? He knew at least he would never hope to.

“Fate isn’t on our sides sometimes, and I know it’s been hard for you in multiple instances, but I know you don’t need destiny, something like soulmate marks, on your side. It wasn’t on mine, and I like to think I’m doing pretty well...If it’s any comfort, I’ll always be there for you, Keith,” Shiro ends with his voice trailing to a whisper.

“Thank you, Shiro,” Keith managed to get out. He looked away, in fear that the irony of it would manifest into a visceral response that could lead Shiro to misunderstand. Keith wasn’t angry at Shiro; he never could be. In fact, he could barely blame fate. He just internalized it as a fault of his own, that as soon as he gained someone nice it meant someone that he could lose. The fact that Shiro was still here was more than enough.

The two fondly smiled at each other, in a faux understanding of each other’s situations. They were content, having mended their friendship enough to mitigate losing each other. This was all they needed. Any more, and they were afraid of tipping the alignments of their fates away from each other.

* * *

But the balance snapped with an error, a Pilot Error, and there was no one Keith could run into for solace this time. His soulmate mark burned a bright red on his chest. He wasn’t sure what it meant anymore, if Shiro as even his Shiro, but he took any ounce of hope he could get. Externally, he demanded more investigation, a truth to the feeble ruse they spread like propaganda. His grades dropped, his focus faltered, and dismissal found itself easily after he physically threatened Iverson.

Adam watched from afar, visiting Keith a few times as he settled into a shack in the desert. They bonded in mutual grief, but Adam recognized a determination he’d never contain to come back -- it was a borderline obsession as Keith’s walls filled up with notes and maps. Soon, even Adam couldn’t handle it, and Keith was alone in the desert, working to find his way back to Shiro.

* * *

  
Their fates aligned again, and this time Shiro quite literally crashed back into Keith’s life. He was strapped on a table, changed, but most definitely there. Keith flew him to safety, with a few additional Garrison students, but he paid no mind to them as he helped Shiro to his bed.

Keith didn’t know how he kept calm after two years blinded by rage against the Garrison and desperation to find him, but all he could focus on is seeing if Shiro was okay. He started looking around for some spare clothes and his first-aid kit and was bringing it over to the bed when he was suddenly surrounded by Shiro’s embrace.

“Keith, you saved me,” Shiro whispered, and Keith found his face on Shiro’s chest, awkwardly bent over the bed. He nearly teared up again, realizing just who was holding him and how long he had waited for this again, with a deep, foreboding fear that he was just spiraling down to delusion the past two years. He tried to call out Shiro’s name, but all that could come out is a cracked whimper -- he gave up and hugged Shiro back as tight as he could, never wanting to let go.

The two separated, realizing the intimate position they were in. It was something new and unexplored. Keith stood back up and offered Shiro a hand to sit up on the bed. He still seemed pretty out of it and accepted Keith’s assistance to address any wounds and help him change out. Shiro had changed so much, with his greying hair and a scar across his nose, a constant reminder of his trauma. Keith wanted to ask so much, but held back as he realized what he was just about to do -- see Shiro’s soulmate mark on his bare chest. They had never talked about it in detail before, and trying to look at another’s mark was looked down upon.

“Sorry, I’ll be just outside. If you need anything just let me know,” Keith said as he turned around to start leaving the room, but Shiro caught his arm just in time.

“It’s not that big of a deal, Keith. In fact, it’s not even there anymore.” Keith turned around in surprise, and saw Shiro revealing his chest with a massive scar, seemingly from claws, that covered most of his soulmate mark. Just the edges of illegible letters were still peeking out from underneath. Keith didn’t know what to think -- if Shiro was revealing it to him like this, then it couldn’t be him - or could it be a confession, or-

“I never knew who it was since the beginning actually, and I found out it wasn’t in any language known to, well, Earth at least. It wasn’t until I ran into the Galra…” Shiro’s voice tapered off, and Keith realized the gravity of his confession. His logic blinked right past the fact that it wasn’t him, and he tried to comprehend the pain Shiro went through -- his soulmate was one of them. The ones that did this to him. Keith indignantly looked out the window, swearing to protect or even avenge Shiro for the horrors he had faced. The incredulity of it all stopped him from confessing this to Shiro aloud, but little did he know that a Blue Lion would deliver him straight to the frontlines soon.

* * *

There wasn’t much spare time on the Castle of Lions with Coran and Allura’s training regiment, but in any moment to himself he was lucky to access nearly ten thousand years worth of interstellar knowledge held in the library. It wasn’t hard to find a way of translating the Galran alphabet into something resembling the English letters after listening to a few audio recordings. If it was one thing Shiro wanted closure on, it was at least the name of his soulmate. He wasn’t so sure if he wanted to ever meet them or even look for them, but his curiosity got the best of him.

“Ke-” he continued tracing his fingers around what he remembered his soulmate mark to be. It was difficult with the scar covering the most of it. Shiro knew his muscle memory wouldn’t fail him however.

“Kee..th. Keeth. Keith?” Shiro gasped aloud and dropped the tablet. Shiro couldn’t believe it to be possible, was there a Galran named Keith or perhaps was Keith somehow Galran? He traced his soulmate mark again and again on paper, making sure there was no other way it could be spelt. Luckily, the characters for those two sounds were pretty distinctly angular -- there was no mistaking that it sounded out some rendition of Keith.

He closed the tablet with and rushed out of the library, as if afraid of the truths it held. Shiro stopped in front of Keith’s door, but he paused before knocking, realizing that he didn’t know what he would even say. ‘Hi Keith are we soulmates?’ but what about everything else that they had been through. In the end, it wasn’t like Shiro to make impulsive decisions, so he took a turn left and retreated to his own room.

“Patience yields focus, right Takashi?” Shiro groaned as he deteriorated into a disaster on his bed. He always knew he had an inexplicable connection to Keith ever since he met him. In the past, Keith had already confessed that he had soulmate problems. Surely, he would have said something then if it had been. Keith should be able to read his soulmate mark. Sure, it may be in Japanese kanji, but that wasn’t impossible to decipher. But Shiro’s revelations were stopped with the blaring of the bridge’s alarm. Romance could wait in the face of the sake of the universe after all.

“The Galra are tracking us, through me,” Allura confessed.

“That’s not possible,” Pidge replied.

“Why not? I would absolutely travel across the galaxy to find you, Princess Allura,” Lance said with a deep bow and with a hint of his eye smile shining.

“It’s not you Allura, it’s me.” Everyone looked towards Shiro as he dished his theory regarding the Black Lion and Zarkon’s connection. But everyone disagreed again on the possibility of Zarkon’s bond being that strong.

“Look, as always there’s a tech solution that can help us. I’ve been collecting data from our last encounter with the Galra, and through this algorithm that I’ve developed, I’ve been trying to analyze any recurring patterns. In other words,” Pidge pulled up a visualization of their surrounding system, “I’ve color-coded areas where they’re congregating, within an acceptable margin of error of course.”

“Long story short, a Galra Finder.” Hunk confirmed. Shiro doesn’t miss the sudden flinch that runs through Keith despite everyone else’s amazement.

“So according to this model… we’ll be headed to Taujeer.” Pidged zoomed in to the planet.

“Solid work, Pidge. Everyone should get some rest before we head out.” Shiro suggested to the crew with a warm smile to see them off. But he noticed Keith lingering behind the rest of them, staring at the bright red of Pidge’s visualizations.  
  
“Is everything okay, Keith?” Shiro softly held Keith by the shoulder and gave him sincerely concerned look. Keith’s response seemed familiar.

“I’m fine. . just not feeling well.”

“You know you can talk to me about it.”

“Thanks, Shiro. You’re right, I probably just need some rest as you suggested.” Keith walked right past Shiro, and he suddenly saw a young sixteen year old Keith brushing past him through the Garrison hallways.

Their progress against the Galra was only improving, especially with the severance of Zarkon’s connection and the potential, strong alliance with the Blade of Marmora. Keith and Shiro entered the base, after a far from smooth ride and even rougher negotiations once Keith was taken down to the ground and pinned. The Blade member has unsheathed a sword from within his armor, it’s luxite metallic lustre glistening under the light of the base.

“He has one of our blades! Who did you steal it from.” The Blade member threatens Keith with his own knife, the point dangerously close to his neck.

“Hey!” Shiro rushed to Keith’s side, but more Blade members surround him.

“I’ve had this all my life!” Keith growled out from under the pin of the Blade member above him, careful not to nick himself with any movements considering the proximity of the edge of his knife.

“Black Paladin, can you corroborate your friend’s statement?” Kolivan sternly directed to Shiro, who could only quietly whisper that he didn’t know.

“You’re clearly not to be trusted -- you should leave now.” Kolivan directed and the other Blades let them go from their holds.

“We’re clearly not welcome,” Shiro helped Keith up and was ready to cancel their chances of alliance until Keith stubbornly turned back.

“Not without some answers.” Keith indignantly replied with his knife in hand.

Shiro watched in both agony and admiration for Keith’s enduring tenacity. He fought with a spontaneity that lent him any sort of leverage, considering he was using a short knife as compared to the full-length sword of the other members. He was disadvantaged, but not fully incapable, that is until the numbers doubled again and again. He snapped once Keith passed out and was subject to hallucinations, and luckily the Red Lion had the same idea. With Red attacking the infrastructure from the outside, it gave Shiro the perfect diversion to rescue Keith from within.

Shiro found Keith struggling to get up from the trial center. He rushed over to help Keith, slinging him over his shoulder and ready to face the onslaught of Blade members to get Keith to safety. He put Keith down before running with his arm activated to defend against the blade, but Keith yelled out.

“Wait! Take the blade. . . I know who I am,” and before anyone else can respond, his Blade glows brightly.

“You’ve activated the Blade, but that can only mean that Galra blood runs through your veins.” Kolivan addressed, with all looking at him in shock. But Shiro’s shock is countered by the confirmation of his previous theories. His soulmate mark seemed suddenly warmed. Shiro checked on Keith, expecting shock but there was a deeper acknowledgment than he had expected.

“We were wrong to have distrusted you and your ownership of the blade. We can talk about this further, but seeing as our plans against the Galra empire are time-sensitive, we will need to prioritize that.”

“Let’s regroup at the Castle of Lions. Kolivan, join us in the Red Lion. Keith, do you think you can pilot us back?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine.” Keith curtly responded, but Shiro knew better, so he helped him swing his good arm around Shiro’s shoulder. They make it to the Red Lion, where they simply fit the red paladin armor over the Blade bodysuit in the interest of time. Shiro was certain he’d tend to Keith’s wounds later, but that’d have to wait. The others would be worried too if they were gone for much longer.

  
As expected, Allura’s reaction to Kolivan was harsh to say in the least, and it was even more disapproving with Keith’s reveal. The other paladins were shocked, but Shiro knew that this would be hard for any of them to truly absorb. It’d take even longer for them to fully accept Keith, not to mention that bonding was difficult enough for them anyway. It was going to be an arduous path of rebuilding for Keith.

After the negotiations end, Shiro pulled Keith to the sick bay, and Keith complied, probably due to his sheer exhaustion and shock. He knew he shouldn’t have put the paladin armor on, but it was a necessity not only to ensure his safety while piloting but also to avert an even more adverse reaction from the others if they saw Keith in a Blade suit. Taking it off now, Shiro could finally assess the severity of Keith’s lacerated shoulder. It ran deep, and he’d have to disinfect it and stop the bleeding.

Keith acquiesced, senses dulled by the painkillers Shiro gave him. He worked gingerly, unzipping the suit and peeling it off the wound, soaked in blood. Shiro continued applying pressure to stop the bleeding, preparing the gauze, and through it all Keith doesn’t say a word.

His eyes were glazed over, sure he did find out more knowledge, but this just opened even more unanswered questions for him. He didn’t know what to do with the sudden realization or how to handle how his only friends looked at him with a new disdain. He wondered what this meant to his relationship with Shiro as Shiro continued to pull his suit down to assess his wounds. Keith wished Shiro would just pull it down all the way to look at his mark, even if it was potentially taboo. It wasn’t taboo if you were soulmates.

But Shiro stopped. Keith used every bit of his strength to look up straight into Shiro’s eyes.  
“Shiro…” Keith held Shiro’s hand and urged it to pull the suit down further, revealing the kanji, bright red over his heart.

“I don’t want to hide anything from you anymore. The Galra thing, I didn’t know, but this..” Despite having a premonition, Shiro was still shocked -- a lot of it from sheer gratitude that his premonitions were correct.

“I’m so glad, Keith. I … actually had a feeling too.” Shiro revealed his own soulmark, and Keith couldn’t help but see it’s scarred appearance. “It’s in Galran, so I’ve been learning a bit on the side. It’s not there anymore, but I know it by heart. It spells out your name, Keith.”

“That’d make sense now wouldn’t it hah… in Galran…” and Keith fell asleep from the overwhelming pain and emotional rollercoaster before Shiro could even reply. He helped Keith get comfortable, once his wounds were all tended for. It felt so right, and Shiro left Keith with a soft kiss on his forehead.

“I love you, Keith.”

The next day, Keith woke up with Shiro at his bedside. They had a lot to do to prepare to attack Zarkon with little time to resolve all that had occurred.

“How are you feeling?”

“Better. Shiro, are we really…” Keith slowly rose from his bed, and Shiro gently rushed to hug him, whispering a soft ‘yes’. They hugged tight, never wanting to let go.

“I’m so glad, Shiro. You don’t know how long I’ve wanted this.”

“Me too, Keith… I know it’s been … it was probably difficult for you in the past, but truly this feels right. If it was anyone, having you is more than I can ask for.”

“If only we weren’t in the middle of a war.” Keith sighed as he reached to grasp Shiro’s hand -- domestic bliss if Keith has ever known any.

“We’ve been through a lot, but we’ll make it through, Keith.”

* * *

  
Shiro’s scream pierced through the comms, and Keith could only feel a sudden clench of pain that stung much more than he had ever felt. A sudden sense of emptiness filled his chest, and he was worried. At the moment they could land at the Castle of Lions, Keith bolted out of Red to enter Black, only to see no one there.

“Shiro!...Shiro?” Keith kneeled against the seat.

“He’s gone.” Lance replied solemnly at the door to the cockpit, and Keith’s call for Shiro once again echoed all throughout the hangar. He stayed there, feeling any of the warmth left on the seat, the scent of Shiro lingering, until it all faded to the cold, metallic scent of the hangar. Keith was either moved to his room by the other paladins, or he had dragged himself out -- at that point he couldn’t tell.

Keith’s resolve only festered as he was faced with the same loss he had struggled with again and again. He refused to believe that Shiro could simply disappear, and if everyone else had stopped to believe in him, Keith would never stop. Everyone thought that Shiro was gone after Kerberos, and this wasn’t any different.  
  
“The Universe still needs defending.”

“The Black Lion needs a new pilot.”

“I’m sorry, Keith.”

There was no end to the litany of apologies and excuses, but Keith was unfazed as he ignored them. He went along with the missions and the daily training, but every other moment of his free time was spent drifting through the expanse of space in Red.

He was grateful for Red, if not anyone else. They spent hours together, and she became a personification of his shack back in the desert. He opened the map of the system with all the various quadrants he already explored, and she helped nudge him in new directions and away from danger. It wasn’t for weeks until he ran into a small pod, the first sign of anything remotely indicative of Shiro within the expanse of space. He knew instantly that he had miraculously found him. For all that the universe has held against him, he could at least rely on it to bring him back to Shiro.

  
Back on the Castle, there were of course joyful celebrations that Shiro was back. Deep down, they felt the guilt of giving up on Shiro and not trusting Keith’s enduring faith. The least they could do was to keep things quiet to let the two catch up for a few days. Within the soft lighting of Shiro’s room, Keith sat down on Shiro’s bed, tenderly holding his hand. Keith’s fingers softly grazed over Shiro’s knuckles.

“Shiro, I thought I lost you again.”

“I know, Keith, I’m sorry… just how many times are you going to have to save me before this is over?”  
  
“As many times as it takes,” Keith smiled back and moved closer to hug Shiro. He could feel the utter relief as he felt Shiro’s arms around him. He let go, and Shiro caressed Keith’s face before they fully separated. With his other arm on Keith’s back, he pulled Keith closer, and they met in the middle for a slow kiss. It was Keith’s first, but to Shiro it felt like his first too. It was a totally different experience that enveloped all of his senses. He pulled Keith in again, and now Keith’s hands reached up and tangled in Shiro’s long hair.

Keith moved down and started kissing at his exposed neck, letting his instincts take the reigns. He’d wanted this for so long, to give himself to Shiro, to please him. Shiro breathed out heavily in approval, coaxing Keith to continue as he brought Keith’s legs to straddle around him.

“Is this okay, Keith? We can wait.”

“Yes, Shiro, please I want too. I’m scared that if we wait…” Keith stopped kissing Shiro, but he rested his head on his chest, arms enclosed tightly around him, resembling his desperation to keep Shiro by his side.

“I just want you to be comfortable, Keith. It’s not like I’ll just disappear by the hands of the Galra again --you’ll always find me,” Shiro chuckled, but the lack of the reply told him it was too soon.

“Please, Shiro. I don’t want to wait anymore,” and with that Shiro brought Keith up for another kiss, and his hands found a way to the hem of Keith’s shirt.

Keith helped him roll his shirt off, and Shiro laid fresh kisses trailing from his lips down to his soulmate mark, where his tongue traced the kanji of his own name. His heart raced, seeing Shiro like this, looking at him in adoration and eyes glazed over in want, was enough to push Keith closer to the edge. Shiro moved closer to his already hard cock bulging beneath his jeans.

“Wait, Shiro.” He stopped right away, snapped out of it and back with his usual countenance of patience and understanding.

“I want,” Keith moved his face close to Shiro’s lap, “you to teach me.”

But with that, Shiro’s patience ran dry, and he swallowed audibly with the sight of Keith nearly nuzzling his groin and settling down on all fours between his thighs.

“Oh baby…” Shiro slid his already half hard cock out of his boxers, and Keith took it in his hands without hesitating. His face flushed even further as he could see Shiro getting bigger as he wrapped his hand around. With his hand in Keith’s hair, Shiro gently guided Keith towards his cock, and Keith eagerly licked a stripe up his cock and started suckling at the tip. Shiro’s soft groans were all instructions as Keith needed.

“You’re doing so well, Keith. Slowly and be careful with your teeth,” Shiro said with a new tone that Keith had never heard before, voice coated in lust. Shiro clenched the sheets around them as Keith moved further down his cock, being careful to cover his teeth. He takes as much as he can before moving up and down, building a comfortable rhythm.  
  
“Hah...you’ve always been a quick learner.” Keith hummed with relief that he was pleasing Shiro, and he began to just let go and enjoy Shiro’s cock in his mouth. He used his tongue to feel it further all while sucking it. He wanted to go further, to fully feel all of Shiro fucking into his mouth but he could feel his gag reflex rising and his eyes watering -- Shiro noticed too and stroked Keith’s hair to slow him down a bit. It’d take a bit more time to get there, but this was more than enough.

“Look at me, Keith” Shiro whispered, and Keith was rewarded by the sight of Shiro’s flushed face and parted lips, all undone because of how good he’d been for Shiro. It only encouraged Keith to try harder, as he built up a quicker rhythm and could hear Shiro’s breathing hitch in response. Shiro groaned at the sight of Keith’s cheeks hollowing out while taking his dick, and he used every ounce of his willpower not to just thrust it into his throat deeper. Then Keith continued so all while looking up at Shiro, and just seeing Keith’s beautiful, unyielding purple eyes looking up at him through all of this. Keith knew he was close to coming with how Shiro’s cock was twitching and his breath more erratic.

“Keith, wait ahh…” but he does just the opposite, holding on tight and signaling Shiro that he shouldn’t pull out. Shiro’s will dissolved and he thrust deep before coming straight down Keith’s throat, not even giving him a choice to swallow or not. He nearly chokes, but worked to not waste anything.

Shiro panted with his head bent back, overwhelmed with the residual pleasure all while whispering soft praises to Keith and petting his hair. He looked back down and chuckled lovingly at the sweet, abashed expression on Keith’s face as compared to how good he was just a few moments ago. Truly, Keith checked every box imaginable so far, and he couldn’t wait to find out the rest.

“You’re so good, Keith, now let me teach you something else.”

* * *

  
But these were the only times they really seemed to really understand each other. Otherwise, there was an unshakable tension between them ever since Shiro’s return. Keith didn’t want to boil it down to the struggle over leading Voltron. After all, he didn’t even want to be a leader in the first place, he was held down the fort until Shiro came back, and he did.

Keith dwelled in the thought of only getting along with Shiro when their carnal desires had the best of them. He frankly missed the more...wholesome support, just to resolve their demons together while watching the stars in the observation deck or to spar together and teach each other new ways to enter chokes from any takedown. But now, it was just disagreements on who should lead, how they should do it, and what the next steps were in fully eradicating the Galra. He understood where Shiro’s priorities were, but he couldn’t help but feel there was something off, and there was a clear distance developing between them.

He wasn’t the only one to notice, however. Lance often found Keith alone on the observation decks these days. He decided to join him one evening, and he knew something was off when Keith didn’t even bother to glare or say something sardonic in response.

“Hey Keith, what are you doing here?” Lance asked, as if he didn’t know that Keith had been frequenting the deck alone.

“Could say the same to you.”

“Come on, don’t get all defensive. I’m trying to just check up on you.” Lance was expecting Keith to lash out for pressing some on some of his buttons, but all he got was an appreciative look back. This was a first, and that meant it was serious.

“It’s nothing much, Lance. Just thinking about where I’ve been, where I’m headed.”

“Wow, giving things a thought while just heading straight on? This isn’t like you.”

“What can I say, maybe I don’t want you always getting on my case haha.”

“Okay, fine then. But seriously, what are you going to do?”

“I was thinking of maybe leaving to go on longer missions with the Blade. I feel…” Lance could finish the thought, that he thought he belonged there better, and it hurt to see that after all they’d been through, there was something holding Keith back still.

“But Shiro’s back. Hell, he’s your soulmate. Why would you?”

“Yeah, I know. I guess, I just wanted to improve myself more.” Lies, Lance thought. Keith wouldn’t leave Shiro for the world, and he could see for himself how much Keith has matured past the antics of being the impulsive paladin he once was. This wasn’t just an issue with Keith.

“You’ve been improving here, look, I know I was being a hard-ass while you were piloting Black, but you seriously have been doing...decently.” Lance admitted. It was hard, but it was harder seeing Keith so unlike himself. He didn't want to blame Shiro, but he wasn’t the one here on the observation deck with Keith like he always was. There was something off about him too.

Keith only stared at him in disbelief, as if it were the only words of encouragement he’d gotten recently.

“Don’t ever think you’re not welcome here. We need you.”

“Thanks, Lance. Maybe I’ll see what Shiro thinks about the whole Blade situation.” Keith got up to leave, but he hesitated at the doorway.

“Red really likes you, Sharpshooter. It’s an honor to pass her onto you.” Keith managed to mention with a slight smile, but his eyes betrayed him. Lance took it as a compliment, but there was a tone of finality laced in it that just didn’t sit well with him.

  
A few days later, Shiro did let him go -- with encouragement, in fact.

* * *

Keith should’ve known. ‘Shiro’ attacked with lethal intent in every blow -- the only thing that saved him was his Galran instinct for survival. He was so tired, but he promised that he’d always save Shiro, again and again. From the beginning, he would never give up on Shiro, even if he gave up on himself, so when ‘Shiro’ fell into oblivion, so did Keith with him.

Once again, he fell back into Shiro’s arms, but this time in the astral plane. The familiar undercut and an unforgettable, poignant look that doomed Keith from five years ago during the presentation.

“Shiro?” Keith ran up to him and hugged him tight, a feeling of enamoration that he hadn’t felt in a while.The warmth was distorted in the astral plane, but somehow this felt more right than it had been a while. He felt Shiro trembling, his face buried in the crook of Keith’s neck now.

“Keith, I died,” he whispered, and Keith’s eyes widened in bewilderment. He felt his knees weaken, and Shiro held him up from the utter tightness of his embrace.

“What, Shiro” Keith desperately breathed out, feeling panic rise. How did he not save Shiro? Who did he save?

“Keith,” Shiro placed his hands on Keith’s shoulders to separate them and wipe the tears starting to form around Keith’s glossy eyes, “I died in the fight with Zarkon -- I’ve been here since then.”

“Then who--” Keith gasped as he saw’s Shiro’s form fading, the astral plane becoming more and more bright around him.

“NO! SHIRO!” he yelled, hopelessly clawing through the air in hopes of catching any more of Shiro before he disappeared.

Keith woke in the Black lion with the Shiro that never was his, yet he had given his everything.

* * *

Keith couldn’t forgive himself as he piloted Black through the expanse of space with the other paladins following suit in their own respective Lions. They had defeated Lotor, and they haven't looked back. Allura had saved Shiro, quite literally resurrecting him and freeing him from the delirious imprisonment of the astral plane. Shiro recounted his time there, the emptiness, the trauma of “Kuron’s” memories beginning to align with his own after being put into that body.

Every time, he was watching his body do something unaccounted for -- a man possessed.

Every time, Keith would tense up, and Shiro figured that it was the discomfort how Kuron had treated him and what had happened at the clone base.

In reality, Keith was simmering in the utter regret and disappointment that he could not have seen through a clone, a fake, of his own soulmate. How he could have freed Shiro much earlier if he had only known.

They spent their journey back to Earth split apart and unwilling to sort out their respective guilt. They’d been torn apart so many times that they felt frayed and unable to come back together. Eventually, they both figured, they would have time.

* * *

With all distractions aside, it took Keith being in a coma for two weeks for Shiro to face their tattered relationship. He stayed by his bedside day and night whenever he had available time. He was often joined by Krolia, who surprisingly didn’t give him a hard time for everything that occurred.

“Thank you for always being there, Shiro, I know it hasn’t been easy on you either.” Krolia said one afternoon as they sat, waiting for Keith.

“Krolia, I’ve put him through so much, if anything I should be apologizing. Please don’t thank me for anything.”

“Trust me, Keith would never want you to apologize. He’s told me so much about you, all that you’ve done for him. He’s loyal to a fault, this boy, why do you think he’s been avoiding you?”

“What? I thought it was because he was … scared of what I had done to him.” Shiro glanced over to the scar, his hand hovering over the deformed and stained skin by his own hands.

“From what he’s told me, he was just ashamed that he didn’t know it was you.” Krolia chuckled bitterly, “but I keep telling him that it was a clone.”

“Exactly,” Shiro sighed, exasperatingly, realizing that Keith was blaming himself for how things turned out this entire time, “Krolia, do you think you can help me with something?”

Krolia’s ears perked up in amusement.

Keith woke up to the soft morning light filtered through the window, in the shadow of Shiro with a beaming smile on his countenance. Krolia and Kolivan were behind him with a knowing smile, but they sneaked out of the room to give the two the privacy they much needed for years now.

“S-shiro?” Keith croaked out as he got a better glimpse of his surroundings, “What?”

“You’ve been out for a few weeks after we defeated Sendak.” Shiro calmly informed him, knowing just how it felt to suddenly return.

“Oh god, Shiro, are you okay?” Keith blurted out as he tried to sit up straight. Seeing his struggle though, Shiro helped him up and chuckled warmly, “Yes, Keith, please I’m fine. You saved me again.” He could see Keith’s face suddenly darken however.

“Shiro, I’m sorry … that I couldn’t save you from the astral plane sooner and that I … with... “ but Shiro shushed him and grasped his arm firmly.

“Keith, I never cared about that. You did save me. You always have.” Shiro knew he wasn’t convinced, “just think, we can have all those firsts together again.” Too soon again, Shiro realized, but he had come prepared for this. He started unbuttoning his uniform.

“Shiro! What, what are you doing?!” Keith yelled, sure that this must have been a fever dream. There was no way that he had woken up from a coma.

“Easy, Keith, just look!” Shiro chuckled as he showed Keith his soulmate mark, no longer covered by scar tissue. The galran letters were bright lavender, the two characters that spelled out “Keith” -- the calligraphy was surrounded by deep pink roses, entwined around decorating Shiro’s chest.

Keith traced his hand over every petal, every thorn, every angle of the characters and didn’t realize the tears that were threatening to spill. Seeing his name, that he could now recognize, on Shiro who wholeheartedly accepted him for who he was and all they had been through. Keith laughed through the tears however, as he realized how glad he was that they could joke around each other again. That things were returning to normal, and it would take a while to feel comfortable again, but this was a huge step.

“Thank you.”


End file.
